The Curse of Agreeability

Together but alone

One of my best friends and I love scholarly debate; by presenting different views on the same topic, we get a chance to re-evaluate our assumptions.

Lack of true friendship and character

A group identity means adopting specific values and norms by deciding which ones aren’t ‘socially’ pleasant. Group culture manifest as running jokes, playfully teasing, and repeated use of words and topics of interest.

Photo by Sam Carter on Unsplash

Do you like the yes-man or yes-woman, who is open to trying everything and assumes everything will work out?

This folk is, in my experience, background characters, lacking depth in where they want to go or who they want to be.

The absence of brutal honesty

Group culture is often directed toward pleasure and relaxation.


Friend groups can hinder your personal development because, more often, the conversations lack depth, vulnerability, and contrasting views. How to solve this?

Photo by Chang Duong on Unsplash



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Jasper Ruijs

Jasper Ruijs


I write short essays deconstructing systems and exploring innovative thinking. You can connect with me on Linkedin 👉